happy thought, happy thought.

i woke up in the middle of the wee hours yesterday(Sunday) because of a bad dream. i've been changing positions so i can sleep again but i really can't. i prayed, turned my pillow to its opposite side and punched it several times (as what my father taught me when i was little when i'm having a bad dream) so it won't go back. i lay my head and was thinking randomly for a happy thought. i can't remember mostly of what i have thought that early morning but realized a lot of things. it's like i was evaluating the things i thought i love doing, maybe i really love doing but it doesn't necessarily brings happiness to me. it was really a long least, i hope i could put everything.

>shopping? tiring thought.
>high school friends? not quite
>high school experiences? not enough
>high school, the school itself? nauseous
>high school? shameful thought
>night out with friends? empty thought
>homecoming? ugh
>5-layered cotton candy in different colors? happy but nakakahinayang kainin and when i'm done eating it, it's sad.
>
>julien and the moments? painful thought

i'll update it when i have time. i need to study for an exam on thurs.